14 August, 2010
11 August, 2010
How to Become a Patient Parent
I am definitely not a patient parent — but it’s a goal of mine everyday, and it’s something I’m dedicated to becoming. Every parent loses his or her patience — it’s a fact of life. There are no perfect angels when it comes to moms and dads — we all get frustrated or angry and lose it from time to time.
But patience can be developed over time — it’s a habit, and like any other habit, it just takes some focus.
List of 10 great tips and methods to help us to become a more patient parent:
1. Count to 10. This one really works. When you feel yourself getting frustrated or angry, stop. Count slowly to 10 (you can do this in your head). When you’re done, most of the initial impulse to yell will go away. Alternatively, if you count out loud to 10, your kids will learn quickly that this is a good sign to run away. :)
2. Deep breaths. This works very well in conjunction with the above tip. Count to 10, and then take three slow, deep breaths. Feel the frustration draining out of you with each breath.
3. Pretend someone’s watching. Pretend you have an audience. You’re less likely to overreact with your child if someone’s there watching your every move.
4. What would my mom do? Using a role model of the most patient people that you know. The best model that I ever think of is my mom. I always think ... “How would my mom handle all of us last time?” And using this role model, I begin to cool down and change my behavior to something more positive.
5. How does this help? When I’m about to say something to my kids, when I can remember, I ask myself, “How does this help my child?” This helps me to re-focus on what’s really important. Yelling or getting angry rarely helps any situation. Must always think of this before yelling or shouting at them. Yelling or shouting is useless and only bring 'side effect' to my kids. My son he learns to yell and shout now. He learns from his mom.
6. Take a break. Often it’s best just to walk away for a few minutes. Take a break from the situation, just for 5-10 minutes, let yourself calm down, plan out your words and actions and solution, and then come back calm as a monk.
7. Teach. This is something that I must learn. I know very well and clear that my kids are just kids — they are not perfect, they do not know how to do things, and they have a lot to learn. I am just like their teacher. I must be patient, and teach them how to do things — even if we have to teach them 10 times before, it might be the 11th time when things click. And we must remember, none of us learn things on the first try either. Find new ways to teach something, and we are more likely to be successful. Think positive.
8. Visualize. This works best if you do it before the frustrating situation comes up. When you’re alone and in a quiet place. Visualize how you want to react the next time your child does something that typically gets you mad. How do you handle the situation? How do you look? What do you say? How does your child react? How does it help your relationship with your child? Think about all these things, visualize the perfect situation, and then try to actually make that happen when the situation actually comes up.
9. Just laugh. Sometimes we need to remind ourselves that no one is perfect, that we should be enjoying this time with our kids, and that life should be fun — and funny. Smile, laugh, be happy. Doesn’t always work, but it’s good to remind yourself of this now and then.
10. Think positive. Must always think that you can be a patient mom. Think positive, and we are more likely to be successful.
Bonus tip: JUST LOVE. Instead of reacting with anger, teach yourself to react with love. Your child spills something or has a messy room or breaks your family heirloom? Yells at you or gets in trouble at school? REACT WITH LOVE. IT'S THE BEST SOLUTION.
But patience can be developed over time — it’s a habit, and like any other habit, it just takes some focus.
List of 10 great tips and methods to help us to become a more patient parent:
1. Count to 10. This one really works. When you feel yourself getting frustrated or angry, stop. Count slowly to 10 (you can do this in your head). When you’re done, most of the initial impulse to yell will go away. Alternatively, if you count out loud to 10, your kids will learn quickly that this is a good sign to run away. :)
2. Deep breaths. This works very well in conjunction with the above tip. Count to 10, and then take three slow, deep breaths. Feel the frustration draining out of you with each breath.
3. Pretend someone’s watching. Pretend you have an audience. You’re less likely to overreact with your child if someone’s there watching your every move.
4. What would my mom do? Using a role model of the most patient people that you know. The best model that I ever think of is my mom. I always think ... “How would my mom handle all of us last time?” And using this role model, I begin to cool down and change my behavior to something more positive.
5. How does this help? When I’m about to say something to my kids, when I can remember, I ask myself, “How does this help my child?” This helps me to re-focus on what’s really important. Yelling or getting angry rarely helps any situation. Must always think of this before yelling or shouting at them. Yelling or shouting is useless and only bring 'side effect' to my kids. My son he learns to yell and shout now. He learns from his mom.
6. Take a break. Often it’s best just to walk away for a few minutes. Take a break from the situation, just for 5-10 minutes, let yourself calm down, plan out your words and actions and solution, and then come back calm as a monk.
7. Teach. This is something that I must learn. I know very well and clear that my kids are just kids — they are not perfect, they do not know how to do things, and they have a lot to learn. I am just like their teacher. I must be patient, and teach them how to do things — even if we have to teach them 10 times before, it might be the 11th time when things click. And we must remember, none of us learn things on the first try either. Find new ways to teach something, and we are more likely to be successful. Think positive.
8. Visualize. This works best if you do it before the frustrating situation comes up. When you’re alone and in a quiet place. Visualize how you want to react the next time your child does something that typically gets you mad. How do you handle the situation? How do you look? What do you say? How does your child react? How does it help your relationship with your child? Think about all these things, visualize the perfect situation, and then try to actually make that happen when the situation actually comes up.
9. Just laugh. Sometimes we need to remind ourselves that no one is perfect, that we should be enjoying this time with our kids, and that life should be fun — and funny. Smile, laugh, be happy. Doesn’t always work, but it’s good to remind yourself of this now and then.
10. Think positive. Must always think that you can be a patient mom. Think positive, and we are more likely to be successful.
Bonus tip: JUST LOVE. Instead of reacting with anger, teach yourself to react with love. Your child spills something or has a messy room or breaks your family heirloom? Yells at you or gets in trouble at school? REACT WITH LOVE. IT'S THE BEST SOLUTION.
10 August, 2010
庆祝生日
今天儿子在学校庆祝他的生日，
他等这一天等了好久，
之前他一直问我，他几时生日。
他还和我说：妈妈，我要生日，我明天要生日。
听到就好笑，多么可爱啊。
为他准备了一个蛋糕，一些零食给班上的同学们。
他等这一天等了好久，
之前他一直问我，他几时生日。
他还和我说：妈妈，我要生日，我明天要生日。
听到就好笑，多么可爱啊。
为他准备了一个蛋糕，一些零食给班上的同学们。
09 August, 2010
孩子把我弄哭了
今晚, 我的孩子把我弄哭了。
当我哭泣时,
我的孩子也哭了。
我把注意力都放在儿子的面上,
我看到到他也流泪,
他的眼泪不停的在流,
我知道他并不是那么的顽皮,
当他看到妈妈哭时, 他也哭,
他还用手摸我的面, 帮我抹泪。
我好开心, 我的儿子帮我抹眼泪,
好感动噢。
女儿还小, 她只做在我的腿上哭泣,
我问他们要听妈妈的话吗, 女儿第一个说: 要。
她也替我抹泪。
我的儿子每天都给我挑战,
我要怎样才可以打败他呢?
真的要对自己说声恭喜恭喜，
给我遇到这么一个有挑战性的事。
一个办法: 用智慧打败他! 加油!
当我哭泣时,
我的孩子也哭了。
我把注意力都放在儿子的面上,
我看到到他也流泪,
他的眼泪不停的在流,
我知道他并不是那么的顽皮,
当他看到妈妈哭时, 他也哭,
他还用手摸我的面, 帮我抹泪。
我好开心, 我的儿子帮我抹眼泪,
好感动噢。
女儿还小, 她只做在我的腿上哭泣,
我问他们要听妈妈的话吗, 女儿第一个说: 要。
她也替我抹泪。
我的儿子每天都给我挑战,
我要怎样才可以打败他呢?
真的要对自己说声恭喜恭喜，
给我遇到这么一个有挑战性的事。
一个办法: 用智慧打败他! 加油!
你長大後，養不養我(來源：孝親佛門)
當我老了，不再是原來的我。
請理解我，對我有一點耐心。
當我把菜湯灑到自己的衣服上時，當我忘記怎樣繫鞋帶時，
請想一想當初我是如何手把手地教你。
當我一遍又一遍地重複你早已聽膩的話語，
請耐心地聽我說，不要打斷我。
你小的時候，我不得不重複那個講過千百遍的故事，直到你進入夢鄉。
當我需要你幫我洗澡時，
請不要責備我。
還記得小時候我千方百計哄你洗澡的情形嗎？
當我對新科技和新事物不知所措時，
請不要嘲笑我。
想一想當初我怎樣耐心地回答你的每一個「為什麼」。
當我由於雙腿疲勞而無法行走時，
請伸出你年輕有力的手攙扶我。
就像你小時候學習走路時，我扶你那樣。
當我忽然忘記我們談話的主題，
請給我一些時間讓我回想。
其實對我來說，談論什麼並不重要，只要你能在一旁聽我說，我就很滿足。
當你看著老去的我，請不要悲傷。
理解我，支持我，就像你剛才開始學習如何生活時我對你那樣。
當初我引導你走上人生路，如今請陪伴我走完最後的路。
給我你的愛和耐心，我會抱以感激的微笑，這微笑中凝結著我對你無限的愛。
When I was old, I wasn't myself before.
Please understand, be more patient.
When I splash soup on collar, When I forgot how to tie my shose,
Please think about how I taught you this when you were a kid.
When I repeat my words again and again you listened many times,
Please listening with your patience, Do not interrupt me.
When you were a small child I must repeat the story thousand of times, until you fall asleep.
When I need your help for shower,
Please do not blame me.
Don't you remember I leave no stone unturned to help you took a bath.
When I perplexed about new technology and fashion stuff,
Please do not laughing me.
Think how patience I was answer your each "why..."
When I tired my legs and can't even walk,
Please give me your young and strong hands.
Just like before when you were learn walk I was your support.
When I suddenly forgot our topic,
Please give me a bit more time let me recall it.
In fact any topic is not important for me, I satisfied just you can listen side of me.
When you saw me getting old, Do not be sad.
Understood me, Support me,
As you just start to learn how to live independent what I helped you.
Originally I introduced life to you.
Now please be a company for me to finish end of my life.
give me your love and patience, I will pay my thanks smile, this smile.
full of my unlimity love for you.
請理解我，對我有一點耐心。
當我把菜湯灑到自己的衣服上時，當我忘記怎樣繫鞋帶時，
請想一想當初我是如何手把手地教你。
當我一遍又一遍地重複你早已聽膩的話語，
請耐心地聽我說，不要打斷我。
你小的時候，我不得不重複那個講過千百遍的故事，直到你進入夢鄉。
當我需要你幫我洗澡時，
請不要責備我。
還記得小時候我千方百計哄你洗澡的情形嗎？
當我對新科技和新事物不知所措時，
請不要嘲笑我。
想一想當初我怎樣耐心地回答你的每一個「為什麼」。
當我由於雙腿疲勞而無法行走時，
請伸出你年輕有力的手攙扶我。
就像你小時候學習走路時，我扶你那樣。
當我忽然忘記我們談話的主題，
請給我一些時間讓我回想。
其實對我來說，談論什麼並不重要，只要你能在一旁聽我說，我就很滿足。
當你看著老去的我，請不要悲傷。
理解我，支持我，就像你剛才開始學習如何生活時我對你那樣。
當初我引導你走上人生路，如今請陪伴我走完最後的路。
給我你的愛和耐心，我會抱以感激的微笑，這微笑中凝結著我對你無限的愛。
When I was old, I wasn't myself before.
Please understand, be more patient.
When I splash soup on collar, When I forgot how to tie my shose,
Please think about how I taught you this when you were a kid.
When I repeat my words again and again you listened many times,
Please listening with your patience, Do not interrupt me.
When you were a small child I must repeat the story thousand of times, until you fall asleep.
When I need your help for shower,
Please do not blame me.
Don't you remember I leave no stone unturned to help you took a bath.
When I perplexed about new technology and fashion stuff,
Please do not laughing me.
Think how patience I was answer your each "why..."
When I tired my legs and can't even walk,
Please give me your young and strong hands.
Just like before when you were learn walk I was your support.
When I suddenly forgot our topic,
Please give me a bit more time let me recall it.
In fact any topic is not important for me, I satisfied just you can listen side of me.
When you saw me getting old, Do not be sad.
Understood me, Support me,
As you just start to learn how to live independent what I helped you.
Originally I introduced life to you.
Now please be a company for me to finish end of my life.
give me your love and patience, I will pay my thanks smile, this smile.
full of my unlimity love for you.
08 August, 2010
05 August, 2010
老师投诉了
星期一老师打电话给我，她告诉我说，
儿子这两个星期在学校不很听话，
把老师给气坏了，还把他带到校长室，
上课不专心，英语很明显退步了。
我担心的事终于发生了。
那天回家就和家婆家公谈了，
要安排给孩子早吃饭，早睡觉，
把时间给调回去。
昨晚老公教儿子做功课，
很明显他很不专心，把老公给气坏，
儿子在考验他的耐心，
好不容易孩子把功课做完。
今天孩子放学回家就说不要吃饭，
不要喝奶，要睡觉。
吩咐家婆只给他睡一个小时，
家婆弄醒他，他哭闹不肯 。。。
另外一段我听到家公说给他继续睡，
家婆说不能。。。
我相信，这是一个过渡期，
只要家婆家公合作，忍耐下，
很快就能看到效果了，
帮帮忙吧! 感谢了。
儿子这两个星期在学校不很听话，
把老师给气坏了，还把他带到校长室，
上课不专心，英语很明显退步了。
我担心的事终于发生了。
那天回家就和家婆家公谈了，
要安排给孩子早吃饭，早睡觉，
把时间给调回去。
昨晚老公教儿子做功课，
很明显他很不专心，把老公给气坏，
儿子在考验他的耐心，
好不容易孩子把功课做完。
今天孩子放学回家就说不要吃饭，
不要喝奶，要睡觉。
吩咐家婆只给他睡一个小时，
家婆弄醒他，他哭闹不肯 。。。
另外一段我听到家公说给他继续睡，
家婆说不能。。。
我相信，这是一个过渡期，
只要家婆家公合作，忍耐下，
很快就能看到效果了，
帮帮忙吧! 感谢了。
23 July, 2010
没有女佣的日子
我已经两年多没做家务了，
上个星期开始拿起扫把扫地，
回想起，哇！我真的已经两年多没做家务了！
哈哈，多么幸福的我。
没有女佣的日子，我得做家务了。
洗奶瓶，洗碗，扫地，抹地，晒衣等等。。。
感觉不错，有点充实的感觉哦。
左晚儿子和我说：妈妈，我要kakak回来。
他已经不是第一次和我这么说了。
女儿更好笑，在机场送机时我和她说：好了，kakak 要走了，
她就开口大哭，多么可怜。
kakak 看到也哭了。
上个星期开始拿起扫把扫地，
回想起，哇！我真的已经两年多没做家务了！
哈哈，多么幸福的我。
没有女佣的日子，我得做家务了。
洗奶瓶，洗碗，扫地，抹地，晒衣等等。。。
感觉不错，有点充实的感觉哦。
左晚儿子和我说：妈妈，我要kakak回来。
他已经不是第一次和我这么说了。
女儿更好笑，在机场送机时我和她说：好了，kakak 要走了，
她就开口大哭，多么可怜。
kakak 看到也哭了。
15 May, 2010
10 May, 2010
04 May, 2010
02 May, 2010
Vacation to Elephant Conservation Centre & Fraser Hill
Today is public holiday, early in the morning we headed to Raub to have our breakfast with my family. Thereafter, we drove to Elephant Conservation Centre as we promised our kids to bring them see & ride elephant. Unfortunately, we were unable to let them ride elephant as early registration is required. After this, we headed to Fraser Hill to pay a visit there. We brought them for horse riding. My kids were so happy, especially my son, he even told that he wanted to ride on his own. We left Fraser Hill at around 6pm. We had our dinner at Hulu Yum for Hulu Yum Lo Mee. Though tired but I felt sastified for our family trip today. I believe my kids felt the same.
So cool of him ! Hehe
01 May, 2010
Beautiful Rainbow
Such a long time i did not see this scene.
Rainbow, beautiful rainbow we saw this morning.
Oops, should be yesterday morning.
On my way to office yesterday morning, me, my hubby & our lovely son saw rainbow.
So beautiful.
Rainbow, beautiful rainbow we saw this morning.
Oops, should be yesterday morning.
On my way to office yesterday morning, me, my hubby & our lovely son saw rainbow.
So beautiful.
29 April, 2010
Heavy Lunch @ Nando
Today I had my lunch at Nando, heavy lunch for me.
Enjoyed my lunch alone.
This was my lunch set.
Enjoyed my lunch alone.
This was my lunch set.
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